


Twice Shy

by Rookmoon



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Feels, Gen, I Edited This Instead of Sleeping, Other, Short & Sweet, Soft Feels, This came out a little intense but i like it, but it's a christmas present, fem reader - Freeform, first person POV, genderless reader, happy holidays!, how does one confess love to an angel, light fluff, no beta we die like men, not a christmas fic, short and sweet, some introspection, thoughts on confessions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-05
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:48:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21592573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rookmoon/pseuds/Rookmoon
Summary: Reader thinks about the relationship she has with Castiel, and if she'll tell him how she feels.
Relationships: Castiel/Reader, castiel & reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	Twice Shy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Tigre5s](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tigre5s/gifts).



I hadn’t ever seen anything like him before. I had never heard the words that he said that first time, at least, not in the order he said them. My name is Castiel. I am an angel of the Lord.

I had no reason to believe him, except that I had asked for help. Now, I don’t even remember what it was I had wanted help with. It had something to do with my mother and how her eyes weren’t always hers. They would flicker like a candle in the wind and I didn’t know who to go to, so I prayed. Castiel had come.

Somehow, I had managed to get him to keep coming back.

The first time he saw me, like, really saw me, we were at a park. I had no reason to approach him, other than my rampant curiosity about why he kept talking about the bees. How they live and support each other. He told me once that Humanity used to be like that. He said it like he watched in wonder as our species spread out and thrived under the sun and the stars. There’s no way he could be that old… and still be that cute.

He reminds me of a puppy. In that way that they don’t really get what’s going on but that’s not going to stop him from enjoying everything in this life that he can. Because he can. I also find myself thinking about the adorable mannerisms he picked up from somewhere. That little head tilt is too cute sometimes. It only makes me wanna coddle him more.

When he told me about all the wondrous things we had done as a species that he had seen, I didn’t know that he meant that literally. I caught myself thinking. “well yeah, people keep records of a lot of things.” 

After I found out he wasn’t joking, I started questioning my sanity. Well, not really my sanity, and more of the dreams I had been having of late. They’re strange in a way that I don’t remember ever having before. Him and me, existing in the same space. Daring to breathe the same air for just a little while longer. Him pointing at the stars on a clear night and telling me just how far away they are and that they, like him, are always watching over me… in the most non creepy way possible. He told me that those stars were his siblings, and since he had uttered those words like they were the only truth he really knew, I remember him whenever I look up and see those gleaming specks of light.

I’m sure that’s not what he intended.

He also told me that one time.

That doesn’t stop me from looking up at the stars and wondering where he is, or how he’s doing, or if he ever actually understands anything he learns here on this planet.

Or why he would come here, after everything that he’s seen. Why Castiel would walk the earth when he can fly?

I wonder if he hears me, sometimes. He must, because he still comes around. He still talks to me when I’m feeling lonely, even if it’s just for a few minutes. He makes everything look just a little brighter. I know it’s sappy and super cliche, but I love him. I doubt he knows. That’s one thing that I’ll never let slip.

Well maybe not never. Maybe one day, when he's got more time to spare between his adventures out there in the great wide world. When I'm really to tell him, and when I'm more certain if his feelings for me. That's when I'll tell him how when I'm with him I feel free, and light and pure, because in his eyes I am. And how there's nothing I'd rather do than spend the rest of my life with him.

Maybe one day, he'll be willing to spend that time with me as well. Maybe, if I'm lucky, hell always be my guardian angel.

\-----------~•~----------

Little did you know, Castiel had heard it all and was biding his time to tell you that he had felt something aflutter in his chest when he thought about you as well.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first thing I've really written for Cas (who was being a pain so I did most of it from Reader's perspective), but I hope you like it!!!


End file.
